As a parent, it is agonising to see your child lose their self-confidence.
Children and young people’s confidence goes through natural highs and lows as they grow up. However, big life changes – like starting a new school, moving house, friendship break-ups, and many other factors, can cause their confidence to vanish.
Almost overnight, children can go from being confident, happy and self-assured, to quiet, anxious and withdrawn; sometimes it’s difficult to tell how or why it happened.
Lack of self-confidence is on the rise in young people and, long-term, this can lead to other problems in their lives (and also later in life), but if we work hard to understand what’s causing the loss in confidence, and if we apply ourselves to boosting children’s confidence, we can help them get back on the path of “self-actualisation” – the journey of confidently being and becoming who they are meant to be.
ACTING BOOSTS CONFIDENCE (ABC)
Most parents have either an intuitive understanding, or actual experience, that drama classes boost kids’ confidence. It is undeniable that drama kids are more confident kids; you only have to look at the google reviews of any drama school to see the huge number of parents expressing their thanks at the leaps and bounds in confidence their children have experienced, through drama.
The most obvious explanation for drama boosting kids’ confidence is that, as children become confident actors, they become more confident when “acting” in other social situations in real life; but that’s not the whole story. We’ve been offering drama classes to boost kids’ confidence for over 15 years, and the truth is, the confidence drama gives children and young people is so much more than being able to perform to an audience.
Some of the language around confidence can be a little confusing, so here’s a definition of 4 terms we’re going to be using in this article.
Self-confidence – believing in your skills and abilities. You trust yourself; you truly believe in yourself and what you can do. When you lose self-confidence, you begin to doubt yourself, and your abilities. You might think you’re rubbish at doing something.
Self-esteem – the way you feel about yourself. You like yourself, and are kind to yourself. Children with low self-esteem have a poor opinion of themselves, for example how they look, or speak. They might blame themselves unfairly, and apologise a lot.
Self-worth – the feeling you have inside, of being valued and worthy of love. You feel like you belong, and you deserve to be here. If a child lacks self-worth, they may believe they are a terrible person, or they don’t deserve to be here.
Self-knowledge – knowing who you are. It’s how realistic you are about your own abilities, preferences, wants and needs. A child with low self-knowledge might make poor decisions, and might find it hard to trust in the decisions they make.
DRAMA RAISES SELF-CONFIDENCE
Drama raises children’s self-confidence, as they practise new skills and face new situations.
Expert drama teachers know how to build skills incrementally, taking time to gradually acclimatise young people to public performance, and never pushing young people beyond the bounds of their ability. As children become confident with their skills at each phase, the teacher will increase the difficulty of the task, or the time in the spotlight, while never pushing the young person beyond the bounds of their confidence or abilities.
This process is known, in education, as “scaffolding”. The teacher acts as a “scaffold” to the child’s growing confidence and skills. In whichever direction the young person grows, the teacher provides the safety scaffold so that the child can build confidently and creatively, within their comfort zone (known as the “Zone of Proximal Development”). With each new growth in confidence and skills, the teacher moves the scaffolding, their support, fractionally outwards – always within reach of safety, and always providing room for growth.
In practical terms, this means never being overly protective, while also never putting children on the spot in difficult situations. We allow ample time for groups to explore characters, rehearse scenes, and craft dialogue. Slowly, and with encouragement, the group grows confident enough to present their work for an audience. The joy and pride felt, when they finally perform the piece they have practised, is one of the many things that makes drama teaching the best job in the world.
DRAMA BOOSTS SELF-ESTEEM
Drama boosts children’s self-esteem, by giving them an insight into how others perceive them.
The process of taking on a character, to present in front of an audience, frees young people to express themselves, without the pressure of judgement. We call this “the Mask of Drama”, and it is powerfully liberating. When in role, “being someone else”, the fear of judgement for being you is lifted. The audience is watching a “different person”, even though it’s still you. In this way, young people can express themselves fully, without being anxious about criticism about themselves.
Audiences are incredibly forgiving. The very fact that you’re up there on stage or screen, lends authority and prestige that is impossible to forget. When we talk about people “catching the bug” of drama, it’s the addictive exhilaration of being able to explore and present the whole rainbow of your heart and soul, through the characters you play.
Drama groups are unbelievably positive environments, where young people can grow in self-esteem, without fear of recrimination. This is particularly true of screen-acting, where, if you get it wrong, we simply go for “take two”. The boost to children’s self-esteem is immediate, and long-lasting. Seeing others go through the same process, and sharing the pride in their work, helps children to be kind to each other, and likewise be kind to themselves.
DRAMA ENHANCES SELF-WORTH
Drama is a broad church; home to many diverse people, with a spectrum of personalities and abilities. It is instantly accessible to a whole range of ages; welcoming to newcomers and inclusive of all abilities. There is a place and a purpose for everyone, in the huge variety of roles, both on screen/stage and off. Everyone is valued and respected for who they are and what they do. Children grow in self-worth as they realise they deserve the applause they get, for the hard work they put in.
Expert drama teachers know how important it is to foster a non-competitive environment. Instead, we emphasise collaboration, and finding fulfilment, in working together with peers to achieve common goals rather than competing against them. ACT 2 CAM is a non-competitive drama school, where we don’t compete, or audition for roles – children and young people create their own characters through improvisation and roleplay, and choose their own actions in the storyline.
Drama teaches the skill of openness.
Everyone is encouraged to welcome and respect each other, and to value everyone’s contribution as vital. The common goals that we work towards foster a sense of community, where strong friendships are made, and children can grow in self-worth. Children and young people become more confident in their abilities, and their sense of belonging, certain that they are a valued part of a group, and that their voice will be heard.
DRAMA FOSTERS SELF-KNOWLEDGE
Drama fosters self-knowledge, by giving people a safe space to take risks and explore possibilities.
At its heart, drama is about enquiry and exploration. We actively encourage children and young people to examine the world around them, to interrogate their beliefs and make new discoveries about themselves and others. In the safe space of the drama class, students grow in self-knowledge, finding out who they are and who they aren’t; what they like and don’t like; what they are good at, and what are their areas for development.
Drama explores social situations, where children and young people place themselves in fictional dramas, and ask themselves what they would do if it was them. We call this “The Magic If”. We ask students, “If it was you, in that situation, how would you feel? What would you do?” This encourages young people to harness the power of their imagination, to immerse themselves in a hypothetical situation, and to gain new self-knowledge.
It is incredibly difficult, if not impossible, to see ourselves as others see us. Drama allows us to objectively reflect on who we are, through the eyes of others, because evaluation is embedded at every step of the drama process. In rehearsal, we get feedback from our peers; in live performance, this comes in the form of audience attention, and applause at the end of a show; in film, you have the final product that you and others can watch back and review. Children and young people can gain valuable insights that set them on a meaningful journey of self-knowledge and understanding.
CONFIDENCE IS NOT A STRAIGHT LINE
As a parent myself, I’ve seen my own children’s confidence wax and wane with the same trials and tribulations of growing up, that every child experiences. I’ve been through some dark times with them all, and agonised to see my beautiful children floored by the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune; and I’ve watched them rise again, like a phoenix from the flames. Such is the lot of a parent, and no doubt you’ve felt the same way too.
One thing I’ve learned, as a parent and teacher, is that confidence, like ability, is never a straight line. It’s two steps forward, three steps back… then four forward again. In education, we call these “White Knight Leaps”. Like the knight on a chess board, you never know when, or which direction it’s going to go, but when it does it’s always surprising, and never in a straight line.
And, right at that moment when you think your child will never grow in self-confidence, they’re off, often in a totally unexpected direction. Stay strong, believe in your little ones, and Find them a drama class!
